Do you see the world as a beautiful place, or an ugly one? A place worth protecting, exploring, and living in? Or do you see it as dangerous, sad, or perhaps even dull? Both sides of this dichotomy depend largely on what you choose to focus on: beauty or adversity.
Romantic relationships are comparable in a similar sense: they can be wondrous adventures, but they aren’t without conflict and hardship. However, our worldviews in particular hold much greater power. So much so, that they may influence our views of our relationships—without us even realizing it. According to recent research from the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, these are reasons for this.
Our Primal World Beliefs
Over 8.2 billion people in the world, as of today, call Earth their home. It is the context of everything that we have ever known and loved—our families, our friendships, our travels, and our existence. Simultaneously, Earth is also the backdrop for many terrible things: war, poverty, hatred, and violence.
In all, it’s a highly multifaceted place. It would be impossible to describe every good and bad thing that has ever happened in our big world, let alone predict all that is to come. Thus, it’s decidedly difficult to sum up our feelings about this planet as a whole in our own few words. In light of this, Dr. Jeremy Clifton—in a 2019 study published in Psychological Assessment—found a way to encapsulate the many feelings and beliefs we may have about the world.
Specifically, Clifton conceptualized primal world beliefs or primals—our environmental beliefs regarding the world’s overall character. Considering thousands of years of descriptions of the world by philosophers, psychologists, and scientists, he produced three large categories of primals. Overall, they can be summarized as good versus bad:
- Safe Versus Dangerous. Those with a safe worldview perceive the world as a place of pleasure, renewal, progress, and cooperation. They see it as stable, just, and relatively harmless—a space where good things can thrive. On the other hand, a dangerous worldview paints the world as bleak and unforgiving. It’s seen as a declining, fragile, and competitive place, rife with injustice, threats, and misery.
- Enticing Versus Dull. An enticing worldview is one of curiosity and optimism. People with this perspective see the world as abundant, beautiful, meaningful, and full of opportunities for exploration and improvement. It’s a place worth engaging with—rich with humor and wonder. Conversely, a dull worldview sees the world as barren, uninspiring, and hard to change. It’s perceived as boring, ugly, and devoid of meaningful or enjoyable experiences.
- Alive Versus Mechanistic. People who view the world as alive believe in an intentional, interactive relationship between humanity and the environment. They feel a sense of purpose and connection, as though they are meant to be part of the world in a meaningful way. By contrast, a mechanistic worldview suggests a universe governed by chance. Those with this perspective feel the world operates independently of them, without intent or interaction, with little belonging or purpose.
According to Clifton’s surveys, 20 percent of U.S. citizens see the world as a bad place—namely, as dangerous, dull, and mechanistic. On the other hand, 70 percent of the population sees the world as a good place—safe, enticing, and alive. Finally, 10 percent see the world as just mediocre—somewhere in between each of the three categories.
Primal World Beliefs and Relationship Satisfaction
Since the conceptualization of primals, ample research has explored how our most basic views of the world influence our lives—from our political views and well-being, right down to our health. However, its influence on our relationships was largely underexplored. Edward Lemay, a professor from the University of Maryland, sought to fill this gap in knowledge.
Consequently, Lemay studied over 230 couples over a year. The diverse couples—some married, some engaged and some just dating—reported on their relationships, their and their partner’s responsiveness, as well as their views of the world in daily diaries. From there, Lemay assessed the influence that primals may have on couples’ overall relationship satisfaction.
Overarchingly, the results were clear: Couples with good worldviews had much higher overall relationship quality. Specifically, couples who perceived the world as a good, enticing, or opportune place had greater satisfaction within their relationships. Additionally, they were also more likely to endorse approach goals in their relationship—that is, they treat their relationship in a way that focuses on desirable outcomes, as opposed to simply just avoiding negative outcomes.
According to Lemay, positive world beliefs promote mutually caring and satisfying romantic relationships.
How You See the World Is How You See Your Relationship
Considering these findings, we can surmise a simple truth: How you see the world is likely how you see your relationship. Of course, we cannot ignore how much pain the world has brought us. However, we also cannot ignore how much beauty there is for us to bear witness to. Naturally, the same goes for love.
Ultimately, our worldview is an active choice—not just a passive observation of the world. Every day, we have the opportunity to focus on the suffering and destruction around us, or instead, on the beauty, hope, and potential for change. This holds for our relationships. We can dwell on arguments, disappointments, or heartbreaks, or we can choose to cherish the love and trust that have brought us together.
This isn’t to say we should ignore pain or gloss over the challenges in our lives and relationships. Rather, we should acknowledge these difficulties without letting them structure our perspectives. When we choose to believe in the good and the enticing—in the world and in the people we love—we allow ourselves to believe in growth, love, and abundance.