How can one develop as a leader? In my opinion, the key is your personal growth, which continues throughout life. There are multiple skills that prepare you to assume leadership roles at work or in your community. Of these, developing your ability to speak in front of others ranks high.
For many, this may be one of their greatest fears. Estimates of people with some degree (mild, moderate, severe) of glossophobia (speech anxiety) range from 25 to 75 percent, depending on the population surveyed and how survey data is aggregated. My experience, based on my teaching and coaching public speaking, has been that more than half have some speech anxiety.
I once was asked to emcee a small event, 40 or so people, all of whom were accomplished, successful professionals. Part of the event was to be a few remarks from each of the attendees. Before the event began, I circulated among the attendees to arrange the order for the remarks. To my surprise, most said, “Sorry, I can’t speak in public.” But I understood. In my youth, I had the lead in a Christmas pageant. I was so afraid that I threw up and could not do it. As I grew older, my fear of speaking continued. Nervousness, palpitations, sweaty palms. I knew I had to overcome my fear.
I read about public speaking, looking for ideas to help me. I learned that speech anxiety is one of the most common forms of social anxiety, with multiple therapeutic approaches. Among suggested techniques were breathing exercises. Eventually, I found a breathing exercise that worked well for me. Here is that technique:
- Take a deep breath. Hold it briefly. Slowly let it out. Do this a few times.
- Now take a deep breath, hold it, slowly let it out, but before taking another breath, try to linger at the end of the exhale. After exhaling, you can experience a spot in your chest where you feel totally relaxed. Look for that spot and stay there briefly before the next breath. The relaxation spot is brief at first, but it can grow through practice.
- Continue doing this, staying at the relaxation spot longer each time. With practice, you should be able to find that spot easily and go there before speaking in public. It is a way to relax your body and mind.
I don’t recall the source from which I learned this technique, but this technique works for me. The key is finding and growing the relaxation spot. I still use this technique today. While I am waiting to speak, I use my regular breathing to go to the relaxation spot. When I stand at a podium in front of many people, I take a breath, feel the spot, and then start speaking. I can speak in front of hundreds with no problems. This is a technique I have taught to help others.
When people know you can speak in public, it can open doors and opportunities. I once was on a consulting team studying grocery store operations (commissaries) at U.S. Air Force bases throughout Europe. At the end of each visit, the team leader gave a presentation about our findings to the base commander and senior staff. During a visit to Spain, the team leader became ill and asked for a volunteer to do the presentation. I volunteered, and, after that, I was the team member who did our presentations. This eventually led to my presenting the results of our studies to general officers at the Pentagon. These were good experiences made possible by my ability to speak effectively in front of others.
If you have difficulty speaking in public, consider developing this skill. I have several friends who swear by programs such as Toastmasters. Good public speakers are not necessarily leaders, but the best leaders usually are.
Adapted from my chapter “Be Prepared to Lead” in The Experience of Leadership, edited by Fred Stuvek, Jr. Used with permission.