When most of us think about values, concepts like “justice,” “kindness,” and “courage” come to mind. While values indeed include overarching virtues by which we strive to live, they also encompass much more. Living a life of meaning according to one’s values can be a buffer against the negative impacts of depression, anxiety, and stress (Vyskocilova et al., 2015). In a 2019 study, researchers worked with people living with chronic illness to name their values and assess whether and how their behaviors aligned with these values (Lim et al., 2019). If you’d like to work through this study’s prompts at home, take out a pen and paper and follow along.
Reflecting on values
In this study, Lim et al. asked participants to think about what they considered most important to their well-being and health. Wanting to expand the idea of “values,” they offer six domains, inviting individuals to identify what is personally meaningful to them in each sphere. Using the domains below, write down your own personal values.
- The first domain is principles. This domain encompasses those big ideas that center us morally. For one person, authenticity might feel like an important principle. For another, forgiveness may be the preeminent guiding ideal by which they live. For still others, fairness or kindness may come to mind.
- The second domain is relationships. Which relationships give your life meaning? Which family members, friends, and acquaintances stand out as particularly life-enhancing?
- The third domain is emotions. What feelings or moods feel meaningful? Do you enjoy a feeling of peace and relaxation? Do you enjoy being excited and challenged? Which emotional states do you find yourself seeking?
- The fourth domain is activities. Which activities—in both work and leisure spheres—bring you the most joy?
- The fifth domain is abilities. Which of your abilities brings you meaning? Do you value your physical strength, your mental agility, your sense of humor?
- The sixth domain is possessions. Are there particular things (including spaces like your home or office) that feel meaningful to you?
Note that these domains are likely to be intertwined. For example, you may value serenity (emotions domain) and recognize that you feel most serene when you are drawing (activity domain) in your garden (possessions domain).
As you reflect on your values, be aware that what gives you meaning may not necessarily bring you happiness in the moment (Barney et al., 2019). For example, you may not particularly enjoy your exercise sessions, but you do enjoy (and value) the heightened energy, mobility, and fitness you gain as a result of these workouts. Make space for values that reflect both present happiness and an investment in future happiness.
Finally, don’t get caught up in naming as values the things you think you should find meaningful (Vyskocilova et al., 2015). Be as truthful as possible.
Identifying behaviors that support values
Lim et al. next asked study participants to identify behaviors that supported their health and well-being and to ascertain which (if any) values are enhanced by these behaviors. If you’re following along with this exercise, you can use the six value domains and ask yourself, “What activities and practices in my life are congruent with the personal values I’ve identified?”
You may be pleasantly surprised to find that many of your activities support your chosen values. For example, if you value certain relationships, it will be gratifying to see that you are making time to nurture those relationships.
Notice where you don’t have a lot of activities supporting your chosen values. For example, if creativity is important to you and you only make art a couple of times a year, you might notice that discrepancy and make a plan to increase your art-making activities.
When illness gets in the way
People living with chronic illness may feel frustrated and sad that their illness limits their ability to live a more values-driven life. For example, if you are someone who highly values traveling to exotic places, it will be painful if illness forecloses this avenue of meaning. Perhaps, though, you can feel joy through reading travel literature, following Instagram accounts of adventurers, and writing about some of their memories of places you’ve seen. Is it the same? No. But there may be creative ways to feed the value of “adventure travel” in spite of illness-imposed limitations.
Revisiting this exercise through time
Vague dissatisfaction with life can often point to the need for more meaning (Vyskocilova et al., 2015). You can use this exercise throughout your life, anytime you feel dissatisfaction you can’t quite pinpoint. By reflecting on your values and considering where your behaviors do and do not support those values, you can point your inner compass toward a value-driven, meaning-laden life.