Throughout my career, I’ve witnessed the struggle between people trying to differentiate between actual hunger and the emotional cravings that pull us toward unhealthy food. Years ago, I worked as a behavioral specialist in a hospital-based intensive weight reduction program where we focused on physical solutions to overeating. However, the cognitive component—our thoughts’ role in fueling our hunger—was largely missing. Sadly, that vital aspect is still largely overlooked today.
You’ve probably heard of the latest wave of weight-loss drugs. While their effects are impressive, their core mechanism lies in suppressing hunger. But could it be that our thoughts are just as influential in shaping the way we feel hunger? What if we could think out of emotional hunger and into healthier habits?
Here are three key thoughts that often lead us to cave into hunger and how we can begin to change them:
1. “I deserve this treat.”
It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you “deserve” a snack or dessert after a long day. This thought usually comes with an emotional context—stress, boredom, or frustration. It’s a way of “rewarding” yourself, but it has little to do with hunger. When we say we deserve food as a reward, we overindulge and may feel guilty afterward.
How to shift your thinking: Instead of rewarding yourself with food, try something that doesn’t involve eating, like a relaxing bath, a walk, or a hobby. By associating positive emotions with non-food activities, you can break the cycle of emotional eating.
2. “I’ll just have one bite…”
How often have you told yourself that you’ll have “one bite” of something indulgent, only to find that one bite turns into an entire serving (or more)? This thought is often a way of justifying eating something you know isn’t part of your plan. It’s a slippery slope because, at the moment, it feels harmless. However, it’s a sneaky way to allow your emotions to override your better judgment.
How to shift your thinking: Ask yourself whether this “one bite” is what you want. Challenge yourself to pause and consider how it will make you feel afterward. Are you eating because you’re hungry or trying to soothe an emotion? The longer you wait to indulge, the more likely you realize that the craving is emotional, not physical.
3. “I can’t resist this food; it’s too good.”
Many of us tell ourselves that we cannot resist certain foods. Whether it’s pizza, chips, or chocolate, we get caught believing we have no control over our cravings. This thought comes from a scarcity mindset—thinking it will never be available again if we don’t eat it now. This triggers a sense of urgency, leading us to overeat.
How to shift your thinking: Instead of thinking you can’t resist, remind yourself that you are in control. Acknowledge the craving, but don’t let it dictate your actions. Trust that there will be plenty of opportunities to enjoy your favorite foods in the future without spiraling into overeating. When you take back control, the food doesn’t have as much power over you.
Over the years, I’ve written about my LOSE model for managing overeating, which I still find helpful today:
L – Letting go of thoughts and behaviors that lead to overeating.
O – Exploring options for accountability to yourself and your relationship with food.
S – Setting small and more significant goals to capture your motivation.
E – Engaging in new thoughts and behaviors that help you reach your goals.
If you find yourself emotionally overeating, I encourage you to ask yourself the following questions to begin your journey toward healthier thinking:
- What thoughts and behaviors do you need to let go of to stop overeating and abusing food?
- How can you hold yourself more accountable in your relationship with food?
- What small weight goals can you set to capture your motivation?
- What new, empowering thoughts and behaviors can you “own” to help you succeed?
Final Thoughts
By shifting our mindset and recognizing our thoughts’ role in fueling emotional hunger, we can think our way out of the cycle of overeating and take control of our relationship with food. The power to break free is in your hands—it’s time to reframe your thoughts and choose a healthier path forward.